Thursday, March 5, 2015

Anna Duggar on Handling Meltdowns

How do you handle meltdowns in public with your little ones?

Anna: For me, when my children have a meltdown in public, there is a temptation to think that my children are better than that. I try to have a humble spirit and have an attitude of loyalty towards my children by being loving and understanding towards them. Often, a child's meltdown in public is the result of a really uncomfortable situation.

I speak to my children in a soft voice and ask what's bothering them. And then I encourage them to respond with positive behavior: "It's been a long day, but you are doing so well! We're in this together."

I ask them what they think the right response is, and then we practice that behavior. For instance, if we're at a restaurant, we practice sitting still at the table and using good manners. And then I praise them.

Like Michelle, I try to lower my voice instead of raise it. I bend down and ask them to look into my eyes. With Michael, since he's a little boy and is so squirmy, I have him put his hands on my cheeks right by my eyes to remind him to maintain good eye contact.

After I reach my kids' hearts, I try to figure out if there is a specific need they have. When we are out and about, I usually pack high-protein snack for my kiddos. When you have a tired kid with an empty stomach, that is really tough. You can keep raw almonds in your purse for forever, if your kids are old enough to eat them.

One of my friends has children who cry very loudly, so she has her children practice loud voices and quiet voices so they learn the difference. Then when her kids are crying, she comforts them and tells them that it is okay to cry but encourages them to cry softly. That's not to say that my children always cry softly, but it helps teach them how to deescalate a situation.

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